China on the Debate

If we don’t laugh, we’ll cry

We’re not here to bum you out about the presidential debate. On the contrary — our job today is to present some curated jokes from the Chinese internet.

Let’s dive in.

“bro is on 1hp,” “I checked my TV’s volume twice,” “dunder mifflin”

And the Winner Is…

A user from Beijing writes,

These two elderly people are 70 or 80 years old and still working hard for their jobs 😎 It’s inspiring.

From Guangdong:

Alzheimer’s disease vs. schizophrenia

From Beijing again:

This is not better than the major variety shows [doge].

I’m watching the recorded US presidential debate, and I’m wondering, “When did the US master the biotechnology necessary to reanimate corpses?” It’s so scary — the USA really is the beacon of humanity. The technology is so advanced.

From Shanghai:

Turns out we can discuss elections in our country after all!

Relevant background: videos of the full debate with Chinese subtitles were quickly uploaded to Bilibili (China’s YouTube analog). Some shorter commentary videos (1, 2, 3) have racked up more than 5 million views in total. No posts discussing the debate, however, went viral on Weibo. Maybe Weibo was more aggressive in toning down coverage.

The King of Understanding

Trump has many nicknames on the Chinese internet, including “Comrade Trump, The Nation Builder,” which you can read about in our conviction roundup:

But in the context of the debate, netizens have opted to call Trump by the title 懂王 “The King of Understanding.”

This of course refers to Trump’s tendency to say “I understand x better than anyone else.” But it’s also a pun in Mandarin: the character meaning “to understand” is pronounced dǒng, which sounds like Donald.

From Sichuan:

The King of Understanding has mastered the art of, “You ask your questions, and I’ll answer mine.” He let it all out on CNN’s home court 😂

Here are some popular “King of Understanding” memes from Trump’s time in office:

“No one understands better than I do.” Source

“No one understands umbrellas better than I do.” Source

Bipartisan Consensus

As with all US election drama, the ~serious response~ from the commentariat is that debate absurdity is just proof that the US is a failing society.

From the news agency Guancha 观察者网:

The sunset of politicians is infinitely good, but the imperial hegemony is approaching dusk. Since 1900, the US’s GDP has ranked first in the world, which has been nearly 124 years, but this is still much younger than the combined 150+ years of “The King of Sleep” and “The King of Understanding.”

…

US hegemony, which came like a comet after the two world wars in the mid-1940s, has also firmly approached the destined dusk. Various visual signs of the twilight of hegemony, such as Boeing airplane and spaceship parts falling all over the floor and gas leaking everywhere, came one after another unexpectedly but reasonably without people being fully prepared.

I’m a big fan of all these astronomy metaphors. If only there were a meme to communicate this feeling succinctly.

“No one understands nuclear weapons better than I do. ”Source

From Beijing:

Trump’s debate today taught me a lesson: If 10% or even 5% of your words in a public speech are obviously lies, then sorry, the media will not stop picking on your lies. But if more than 90% of your words are lies, then the media will really give up, because they really don’t know which words to pick on.

From Guangdong:

While other countries are still internally divided and holding elections, China is quietly working hard to build a community with a shared future for mankind.

To close, I’ll leave you with this classic from 2021:

Have a great Sunday.